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By Nicole Dean
I have a confession.
I’m a mostly-sane WAHM. I’m far from the ‘got it together’ work
at home mom that I’d like to be.
I believe that there are a lot of women out there like me –
clutching onto your sanity while juggling family, daily work
requirements, basketball practice, ballet recitals, PTA
meetings, and the many other responsibilities we carry on our
shoulders.
If you’ve been a WAHM for more than a minute, you know the
predicament we face. We chose to work from home so we could
spend more time with our children. This is great in theory.
What happens, though is that we end up with no scheduled and
defined work time, so it becomes a struggle to find time to
spend with our kids. When you hear other people say “It must be
so nice to work from home so you can spend time with your kids
all day”, you roll on the floor laughing. If only it were so
simple! Finding the balance between work and home can be a
constant struggle especially when work IS home.
I remember the days when I worked out of the home in an office
job. I had two separate and distinct compartments in my life.
There was the office, where I could work in peace and quiet,
focus on projects and be productive. And, then there was home,
where I was able to focus on my children and have fun. I had
scheduled working hours, and also distinct family time.
Now, I have the ‘hom-ffice’, an odd melding of home and office.
The line between the two compartments is unclear. My office is
now an extension of home. And, home is becoming an extension of
my office.
Because of this dilemma, I find that I’ve got the focus of a
gnat. Here’s how my work day goes.
I wake up, grab a cup of coffee, and sit in front of the
computer to check my email. Fifty new messages. No problem. I
get ready to tackle the first one.
“Dear Nicole, I was wondering if you might be interested in” …
“juice in a sippy cup, pretty please my pretty mommy?”
Whoa!! Ok, brain switch! I turn and look at my little girl who
just crawled out of bed. She is a perfect picture of childhood,
with her big brown eyes, sweaty wildly curly hair and big grin.
I hug this rosy-cheeked angel and go to the kitchen to get
juice. Then, I sit back down and attempt to read my email
“Dear Nicole, I was wondering if you might be interested in my
new affiliate program selling” ...
“the new Lego robot I built!”
Brain switch again. I swivel my office chair and see my son,
his blue eyes twinkling, and his face beaming proudly, holding
up his Lego creation. I ‘ooh’ and ‘ahhh’ over the new Lego
invention -- a robot that can climb walls. I rub his blonde
head and tell him how wildly creative he is. He grins and goes
back to Lego-building.
I swivel back to work, and try to get as much done as I can
between the many interruptions, karate practice, dinner and
bedtime stories. Oftentimes, late at night, you can find me
working, while watching late night TV shows. My husband comes
in to check on me. I swivel my chair to get my good-night kiss
and I tell him that I just want to wrap up a few last projects.
I stagger to bed late at night only to start again, before the
kids wake up in the morning.
Are you seeing the pattern? Is there any wonder that I’m
mostly-sane? Look at your own days and I’ll bet they are very
similar to mine.
Despite the frazzled hours and days, and all the distractions,
I love being a WAHM. The honest truth is that I wouldn’t trade
my job for any corporate job in America.
However, as I meet more and more work at home moms, it’s
becoming apparent that I’m not alone in my struggles. Other
moms are setting expectations that are just not matching
reality. What can we do about it?
1. Reclaim your office:
If you have one room that you can dedicate to your work, stake
your claim on it. Clear out all toys and non-work items. Make
your “hom-ffice” a real office. No more messing around with
half a commitment to your business. Your office is your turf.
Protect it.
2. Buy a timer:
If your children are old enough to understand the concept of
time, invest in a timer. It’s a life saver. The next time you
need uninterrupted working time, tell the kids that you’re
setting the timer for 20 minutes. If they give you 20 minutes
of uninterrupted work time, then reward them with quality time
with you. Play a board game together or go to the park.
Set goals this month to reclaim your work area and your time,
and you will take a step closer to being a happy, relaxed, and
successful WAHM!
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